Jeff Goodsell Art

RIP Chester Bennington 2017

I was down in Phoenix AZ for my grandmother's funeral when I got a call from my oldest son asking me if I had heard the news, "Chester Bennington is dead!" He committed suicide this morning (my grandmother's funeral was July 20th). I listened to my son as he talked about it, and I grieved with him because I liked Linkin Park, have for a long time now. Numb has been a staple in my list of go-to emo songs when I am feeling down, but Chester Bennington dead? and to suicide no less? What is this world coming to, there are so many suicides, SO MANY SUICIDES! And I know, because I had a friend commit suicide, and I have gone through a lot of depression through my divorce and choices I made leading up to the divorce. I felt like dying many times, I contemplated what it would be like to  kill myself, and ultimately, because of my friend and my faith in God, decided that, for me, suicide would be cop out. Suicide is easy, one act and you are done, facing life and living is hard, it requires a thousand acts every day, and learning the balance between my spirit and my body. Keeping that balance is hard, and I have to work at it every day. I have so many thoughts and feelings about this, I am really glad that I got to go to Vegas with my son to see Linkin' Park in concert, I considered asking him if he would go to the concert when they come to Utah, I'm glad that I didn't, because there will never be another concert to go to. I don't know what the future holds for Linkin Park, but I'm betting that it looks a lot different now considering the major roles Chester played. I love his music, I love the thought and meaning that he puts into is lyrics, music and videos. I wish he had not killed himself. It is an interesting difference between how the death of my grandmother and Chester feels. Her funeral was a celebration of a life well lived, of a strong woman who endured, and believe me she endured a lot. Chester's death feels tragic and very sad, a light snuffed out of his own will way too soon. This photo is my tribute to Chester, his new song, One More Light keeps playing in my head over and over again as I try to reconcile the reason for his or any suicide, what purpose it plays in the grand scheme of things. I considered for a long time how to paint it, in the end I did this montage of drawings and a photo of him I found online. Even though I never knew you personally, I will miss you thank you for all you have given me through your music and the chance to spend a great weekend with my son going to your concert. Who cares if one more light goes out?...well, I do!